I was 10 or 11, fat and tall, when I first saw this commercial, and boy, I envied how he, Louie, dribbled that ball. I would make sure to watch that commercial every time it shows. I would have recorded it if only I could. I was already playing basketball but knew that I could still be better by learning how to dribble, so I asked to be enrolled in MILO Best E. Rodriguez, where Waltermart is now, with my cousin. When I got there on the first day, I was intimidated by the big coach who welcomed everyone, Mr. Jorge. He was huge, and his voice boomed when he spoke. He scared me to death. Nonetheless, I went through the drills and practiced at home. What I did not know was that we will be judged on how we do with the drills. On the day of the exam, I did not go out of fear. He personally called our house to look for me. I got scared and did not return. What does a 10 year old fat kid know, anyway?
I chickened out. I did not know any better at 10. No one told me to go back and show up. Later in life, I realized that the most basic thing in any endeavor is showing up no matter what. And it is more than just trying; it is committing and persevering. This is where I think the role of sports parenting comes in. But first, I have no bad feelings toward my parents because, to them, sports were more of leisure than character development. In my case, I see it as a path to learning discipline and fortitude while liking what we do. In other words, whether you like what you do or not, nothing is easy, so keep on doing.
This realization helped me apply such lessons to my children. I just encourage them to join competitions and be there no matter what the results are as long as they put forth their best effort. But of course, every best should be better than the previous best, and this is achieved through practice and perseverance. I sign them up and make them go through the struggle, with us on the sidelines as cheerleaders. Because the lesson is not about winning or losing; the lesson is in the process, the struggle, the people who are there to support, and the opponents who are also friends outside the arena. The winning comes later.
Forty years later, the lessons brought by this commercial still live: show up, and never give up.
It is that time of the year again, Iuri’s tennis tryouts. This is causing me so much anxiety, but I am sure it is causing Iuri even more.
After not making it 2017 and 2018, Iuri finally became part of the school elementary varsity team in 2019. Since there were no tryouts for two years because of the pandemic, tryouts resumed in 2022. That year was such a nail-biting tryout season. Iuri had little practice that year, was just getting back into playing tennis, and had just recovered from COVID-19 two weeks before the tryouts. He was still weak and had only played twice before the tryouts, so his confidence was low.
The night before the tryout, he woke up in the middle of the night crying and having a nightmare. It was hard for us to see him that way, but we couldn’t let him avoid trying and let fear take over. On the day of the tryout, he lost all his matches and afterward complained that he had poor eyesight. I told him not to make excuses and to play better the following day. The next day, he won a match against a senior student yet still complained about his eyesight. I then took him to an optometrist. To our surprise, his prescription was above 300. My bad.
On the second day of tryouts, I went to Starbucks in Missouri to get myself a coffee. As soon as I parked the car, I got out, still thinking of the tryouts. I walked maybe 7 to 10 steps, about to go up the stairs, when I noticed my car was moving. I looked again, and yes, it was moving. I rushed back, clicked the unlock button on my remote, opened the passenger side door, jumped in, and stepped over my left leg to hit the brakes. Good thing I did not get into an accident. At least, he got in Team A of junior high school team.
The following year, 2023, it was the same case but under different circumstances. We came from a three-week trip and Iuri was only able to play once during the trip. He only had two weeks to prepare and get his groove back, but it was not enough because classes were about to start in three days by the time we arrived in Manila. So he was only able to train five times before the tryouts. During the tryouts, he almost won the first match, except that at match point, his opponent returned a backhand that hit the net and fell in the service box, which Iuri was not able to reach. He won the second match, lost the third, and zeroed a senior high school player in the last match, earning him a slot in Team A.
This year, 2024, Iuri prepared better. He played more match plays, joined more tournaments, and did more strengthening. A player confidently told him that he will barely get in, but it did not crush his confidence. On the first day of tryouts, he did well. He beat an older opponent who played decent tennis. He told me that he was stiff during the first few games of the tiebreaker but was able to recover in the 5th game. There are 13 players left and only 8 will be selected. To prepare for the second day of tryouts, he played several tiebreakers, practiced his serve, and worked on his strategy. He entered the tryouts confidently. He won 2 matches with a convincing lead, making it into the team with ease this year.
Every parent navigates stress while their child is in a match differently. Some pray, others coach their child, and others do not watch. In my case, I avoid watching and just send someone with Iuri unless there is no choice. I do pray, too, a lot while he is playing.
Handling defeat is another case. I used to process his game as soon as it ended. I learned that I should first allow him to understand everything that happened in the game. For him to personally assess and analyze his game, but it would be tricky for someone who is still developing his game sense.
It was a relief for me and Ingrid knowing that he got into the team this year with no drama. For me, the biggest takeaway from this experience is that hard work, perseverance, and persistence yield positive results, but there’s always more to strive for and no room for complacency.
Jaime, my eldest, is also into sports, specifically bouldering. He recently got into it and has already competed. The results were not bad, considering it was his first time joining. Since I have gained some experience as a parent of an athlete, I am now able to apply lessons learned to him. One example is allowing him to process his performance so that he can be more open to talk about it, and also asking him about his goals and areas where he wants to improve.
Every parent wants to see their young athlete successfully make it in their match, but that is impossible in sports or in any serious activity; sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But it is the journey through the ups and downs of victory and defeat that make the sports journey meaningful.
Panorama 