It is that time of the year again, Iuri’s tennis tryouts. This is causing me so much anxiety, but I am sure it is causing Iuri even more.

After not making it 2017 and 2018, Iuri finally became part of the school elementary varsity team in 2019. Since there were no tryouts for two years because of the pandemic, tryouts resumed in 2022. That year was such a nail-biting tryout season. Iuri had little practice that year, was just getting back into playing tennis, and had just recovered from COVID-19 two weeks before the tryouts. He was still weak and had only played twice before the tryouts, so his confidence was low.

The night before the tryout, he woke up in the middle of the night crying and having a nightmare. It was hard for us to see him that way, but we couldn’t let him avoid trying and let fear take over. On the day of the tryout, he lost all his matches and afterward complained that he had poor eyesight. I told him not to make excuses and to play better the following day. The next day, he won a match against a senior student yet still complained about his eyesight. I then took him to an optometrist. To our surprise, his prescription was above 300. My bad.

On the second day of tryouts, I went to Starbucks in Missouri to get myself a coffee. As soon as I parked the car, I got out, still thinking of the tryouts. I walked maybe 7 to 10 steps, about to go up the stairs, when I noticed my car was moving. I looked again, and yes, it was moving. I rushed back, clicked the unlock button on my remote, opened the passenger side door, jumped in, and stepped over my left leg to hit the brakes. Good thing I did not get into an accident. At least, he got in Team A of junior high school team.

The following year, 2023, it was the same case but under different circumstances. We came from a three-week trip and Iuri was only able to play once during the trip. He only had two weeks to prepare and get his groove back, but it was not enough because classes were about to start in three days by the time we arrived in Manila. So he was only able to train five times before the tryouts. During the tryouts, he almost won the first match, except that at match point, his opponent returned a backhand that hit the net and fell in the service box, which Iuri was not able to reach. He won the second match, lost the third, and zeroed a senior high school player in the last match, earning him a slot in Team A.

This year, 2024, Iuri prepared better. He played more match plays, joined more tournaments, and did more strengthening. A player confidently told him that he will barely get in, but it did not crush his confidence. On the first day of tryouts, he did well. He beat an older opponent who played decent tennis. He told me that he was stiff during the first few games of the tiebreaker but was able to recover in the 5th game. There are 13 players left and only 8 will be selected. To prepare for the second day of tryouts, he played several tiebreakers, practiced his serve, and worked on his strategy. He entered the tryouts confidently. He won 2 matches with a convincing lead, making it into the team with ease this year.

Every parent navigates stress while their child is in a match differently. Some pray, others coach their child, and others do not watch. In my case, I avoid watching and just send someone with Iuri unless there is no choice. I do pray, too, a lot while he is playing.

Handling defeat is another case. I used to process his game as soon as it ended. I learned that I should first allow him to understand everything that happened in the game. For him to personally assess and analyze his game, but it would be tricky for someone who is still developing his game sense.

It was a relief for me and Ingrid knowing that he got into the team this year with no drama. For me, the biggest takeaway from this experience is that hard work, perseverance, and persistence yield positive results, but there’s always more to strive for and no room for complacency.

Jaime, my eldest, is also into sports, specifically bouldering. He recently got into it and has already competed. The results were not bad, considering it was his first time joining. Since I have gained some experience as a parent of an athlete, I am now able to apply lessons learned to him. One example is allowing him to process his performance so that he can be more open to talk about it, and also asking him about his goals and areas where he wants to improve.

Every parent wants to see their young athlete successfully make it in their match, but that is impossible in sports or in any serious activity; sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But it is the journey through the ups and downs of victory and defeat that make the sports journey meaningful.