Influence hinges upon relationships. This is my message to the attendees of my Effective Communications workshop at a multinational company in Batangas.

To illustrate, I used these pens as my visual aid. I told them the following story:

You see, my first encounter with a fountain pen was when I was 8 years old. I rummaged through my late father’s office drawer and found a fountain pen that would not write.

In his eagerness to give me the pen, he flushed and cleaned it. Unfortunately, I lost or destroyed it. It was a Parker 51 vacumatic.

When he passed away, he left a nice Charriol Ballpen which I used for some time. It is now nowhere to be found. I’m careless with these little objects.

Though he never had a collection of pens, he was curious about pens, guns, lighters, and desired nice gentlemen’s implements.

Somehow, his presence affected my interest in pens. Like him, I never really got serious about collecting pens. When I say serious, I mean acquiring 4 pens a month.

I have a couple, though, which I bought after college, one for signing a business contract in Singapore and another out of curiosity. But that’s it.

It was Ingrid who rekindled my interest in pens. I have bought a few pieces here and there, mostly to prevent myself from having sleepless nights doing online research.

My takeaway here is this: the people we are close to, those we have relationships with, can strongly influence us, directly or indirectly. Their presence alone is enough to sway our decisions.

Now, I believe that effective communication hinges upon the establishment of rapport between the communicator and their audience, for only through such rapport can one hope to create meaningful change.

Parker 51 and Opus88 demo

A few days ago, on March 9, we celebrated our 25th anniversary as graduates of the University of Asia and the Pacific. The event included a mass and dinner, attended by 40 of my batchmates, along with approximately 12 officials and faculty members of the school. Additionally, there was a school tour showcasing the new developments, followed by a short and lively program that contributed to the cheerful atmosphere of the evening. Dr. Villegas, the premier economist of the Philippines, delivered a message on our role in advancing the country to its first-world status, culminating in a rendition of a song from “The Sound of Music.”

The reunion was not difficult to organize. Last January, during a dinner with my college classmates, I realized that we had been out of college for 25 years. Wanting to seize the opportunity to gather my other schoolmates, I reached out to our alumni office and assisted in the planning process.

Reuniting with long-time friends is always a joy. It’s both fun and challenging to reconnect with individuals you never interacted with in college, especially when you struggle to recall their names. I even had to ask a friend for the name of another batchmate after exchanging greetings and shaking hands.

Though several officials gave brief speeches, it was Father Soria’s words that left a lasting impression on me. He expressed his enjoyment in teaching EM students due to their positive outlook on life, noting that for them, failure is merely another step toward success.

Many of my batchmates have achieved success in their respective industries. While they provide a valuable network, it’s the relationships forged that truly imbue meaning into reunions. After all, whether present or absent, we are all brothers and sisters raised with the same set of values.

Speaking of values, one that resonates strongly is the concept of making work holy.

*This article is a reflection for our Christian Family Movement fellowship

I am reflecting on the question whether obedience has a positive or negative connotation in today’s society.

During the pandemic, my wife and I watched a few Asian dramas and Western films from Netflix and Viu. After watching several films, I couldn’t help but compare the values portrayed. In Asian dramas, there were many scenes where children would listen to their elders, while in Western films, parents and grandparents were often portrayed as annoying and inconvenient. In one scene from an Asian drama, the protagonist couldn’t go on a date because her mother asked her to look after her grandmother, while in the American movie, the teenager couldn’t have cared less. These films convey a clear message about how obedience and disobedience are practiced in certain cultures, which led to me express to my wife my disappointment. I’m not vilifying certain cultures, but some social practices can break societies and families.

Doubt towards traditional values is not only happening in media but also in institutions like traditional and conservative schools. I have observed that in most institutions much importance is given to cognitive development, skills and post-modern values at the expense of the interior dimension. There are also those in religious circles, who are progressive, and are open to modern social values that undermine obedience to divine authority. I remember that in one mass, less than a month after the desecration of Our Father, a priest called for the acceptance of those who are different from us. Short of saying, to love is to be open minded, accept and tolerate certain groups who assert their values. But then, GK Chesterton said, when we are too open minded, our brain spills.

Our society today sees obedience from the negative light. I dare say that our country’s exposure to Western media and institutions with modern western values has shaped the way we view obedience. Whenever we hear the word “obedience,” the phrase “submission to authority” comes to mind. So, when we are asked to submit, we often feel that we are surrendering our freedom to an authority figure whom we perceive as immoral, flawed, and greedy; why follow authority when many of them are unclean? But on the other hand, obedience is music to the ears of those in power who seek compliance from others.

As a son, spouse, and parent I grapple with the delicate balance between obedience and freedom. As a parent, I expect my child to obey my wishes, but in doing so, it can sometimes make them feel as though I am encroaching on their freedom. I know because I felt this way, too, as a teenager. As a spouse and son to my parents, I often want to assert my will because the ability to do as I please feels like the ultimate expression of freedom.

In essence, I desire obedience from others, but I, with free will, can choose whether to follow or not. This complex interplay between freedom and obedience can make it quite tricky to navigate. So how do we reconcile this conundrum between freedom and obedience?

True freedom and obedience are not mutually exclusive. We do not lose our freedom when we obey; in fact, obedience to God’s authority and to human authority with the right moral sense liberate us from the bondage of worldly passions, thus leading us to happiness. True freedom or Christian freedom involves making choices that align with what is good and taking responsibility for our actions. On the other hand, worldly freedom, one that is rooted in disobedience, gives the illusion of control and power as we are able to choose anything and everything we desire, even actions that go against moral principles. As a consequence of our disobedience, we violate our own freedom and become prisoners of our passions.

Here is what is propose: to embrace obedience and willingly submit to authority, we must perceive freedom as a force for growth, maturity in truth, and one that finds its fullest expression when directed towards God. Such a perspective encourages us to prioritize obedience over disobedience. In this view, obedience becomes compliance.

Indeed, obedience presents its challenges, particularly when it necessitates a battle between our passions and what is inherently right. The Catechism of the Catholic Church underscores the need for preparedness to make sacrifices, exercise discernment, and undergo proper formation to succeed in obedience. To navigate this path effectively, humility must be our guiding stance.

I am not advocating for blind obedience, as history has shown the negative consequences of such blind allegiance. Instead, I advocate for obedience rooted in Christian freedom, that is submitting ourselves with all humility to God’s will; because we know that if our freedom is to be used for good, then obedience to God’s will follows naturally.

In doing so, we unlock a bonus, for obedience to God’s commandments yields profound blessings. Honoring our parents promises us a long life, while compliance with earthly authorities ensures they serve with joy rather than sorrow, an advantage that ultimately benefits us. And in our pursuit of God’s kingdom, grounded in righteousness and obedience to His laws, we discover a source of enduring blessings.

The complex interplay between freedom and obedience remains a challenge to navigate. However, by redefining our concept of freedom, focusing on the moral compass, and embracing obedience as a path to liberation, we can find harmony between these seemingly opposing forces. It is in this balance, guided by humility and Christian freedom, that we discover a path to genuine obedience that enriches our lives and deepens our connection with a higher purpose.

GMA has recently introduced its AI reporters, and it is receiving significant backlash from netizens. This introduction of AI has sparked a moral and ethical debate. Based on what I have read, the main argument is that AI should not replace jobs intended for humans, as it diminishes human dignity. However, there are few to none who support AI in this matter. For others, it is an inevitable consequence of progress that we must all accept.

In some parts of the world, such as the US, Europe, and, I believe, some groceries in Manila, there are already cashier-less checkout counters. In the call center industry, some jobs have already been replaced by AI. Similar to how email disrupted the snail-mail system, AI is here to stay and will undoubtedly take jobs away from humans. However, in the course of change, new opportunities will arise, and there will still be areas where jobs will continue to be in demand, such as in healthcare.

I firmly believe in the saying, “When one door closes, another opens.” Nevertheless, I do not discount the fact that being on the losing end of this battle between AI and humans is challenging. So, how do we cope with the inevitable change that AI brings?

Change is always difficult, but the only way to cope with it is to go through it. As M. Scott Peck aptly stated in his bestselling book, “The Road Less Traveled”: “The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” It is easier said than done because going through change is genuinely a painful process. One must leave behind something they have struggled to obtain for a long time, only to be replaced by something different.

However, it does not make sense to plunge into an abyss of sadness and pain without reason or meaning. This makes “going through it” even more painful and challenging, even absurd. But things change when the suffering and hardships that come with change become a source of purpose and meaning. At this point, suffering ceases to destroy man. As Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor, once said, “Man is not destroyed by suffering; he is destroyed by suffering without meaning.”

Now, beyond the moral and ethical issues raised by AI, the most pressing concern is finding meaning in the disruptions caused by AI and whether the meaning we create is truly more valuable than the displaced humans.

In preparation for my marketing class.

Marketing Lesson: Respect Your Customers

Customers DON’T buy, they CHOOSE products and brands they TRUST. When they pay, it’s a gesture of their trust.

Trust is a function of logic. You earn it once you have fulfilled all your customers’ expectations they pictured in their brain.

In business, trust is the only currency that truly matters. If you want to profit and maintain this trust, respect your market. It is the collective agreement of the market that gives or takes away the value of your product.

In building your brand, be truthful. Avoid deceiving your customers or hyping your product with falsehoods—they’ll see through it. They’re not naive, so don’t treat them as such. Hard selling tactics are easily felt, and quick schemes for immediate returns put customers away. Manipulative tactics won’t foster loyalty.

The value of your product doesn’t rise as a result of what you say about it, but from what people say about how they experienced your product. For positive word of mouth, treat your customers with the respect they deserve.